Posted on Leave a comment

Totality

Before and after the recent eclipse, everyone was using the phrase ” the totality” to refer, of course, to the sun being completely hidden behind the moon’s shadow. Being a word person, it got me thinking about “the totality” of being human.

Merriam-Webster defines totality as a) an aggregate amount : SUM, WHOLE and b) the quality or state of being total : WHOLENESS, ENTIRETY. Totality of being or existence. Totality of our humanness. Totality of knowledge. Totality of purpose. We don’t often use it to think about ourselves, though.

What does it mean to be totally you or totally human, or more importantly, to embrace the totality of our selves and our humanness? I think of our totality as the sum of all the parts of ourselves, good and bad, even or maybe especially those that we don’t particularly like or would rather hide. Those are myriad and some definitely differ from person to person.

But others? Wrong-headed ideas and attitudes, prejudices, fear of missing out, feeling unloved or lonely, judging others, wondering if and where we fit in, worrying about things that haven’t yet happened, on and on. There are so very many things we all do at one time or another, to greater or lesser degrees, things that are just parts of our humanness, bits and pieces of it that we all possess, try as we might to ignore them. I’m reminded again of Thich Nhat Hanh’s “Hello, old friend,” in response to some of these troublesome things we all think and do.

My “Four Dogs” print, though inspired by Matisse’s cut-outs, expresses the totality of me.

With art, our best pieces will be imbued with the aggregate of who we are, what and who we love, made of colors we love with tools we love to use. So my best work expresses the totality of me. Yet for the last couple of weeks I’ve been trying to create a still life for our next local arts exhibit. I had said I would submit to each of the gallery exhibits this year but I had very little confidence about painting a still life or painting anything at all realistic. So I had resorted to looking at abstract still lifes on Pinterest for ideas. I can tell you that this project had, as a result, been highly unsatisfying. No fun. Poor results. The work did not reflect me. Until today.

Today, mostly as a result of writing this letter, I’ve realized that I was looking away from myself rather than into. I asked my son’s opinion on what I was doing, instead of trusting my own–all because I was thinking of my own totality as lacking. I can’t paint anything realistic. Don’t we just do this so often, and to our own detriment? I can’t. I’m not good enough.

As an artist I have been advised to look to my own best work and to what I love for inspiration, rather than looking outside myself. But here I’ve been, all tied up in knots, trying to create work like something I’ve seen, while at the same time thinking about totality. One should have informed the other, but I’ve been at cross purposes. Until today. Shaking my head. Suddenly remembering that my art is mine and therefore needs to express me. It needs to reflect my totality and not someone else’s. How often do we have to learn the same thing?

So as of 5:30 p.m. I’ve had a breakthrough, with TWO pieces that I love. Yippee!! I don’t expect or need to win a prize (though I would like at least one of my pieces to be accepted into the show). I feel the joy one feels from having produced something that is genuine and authentic. Yeah. These little paintings are ME. That feels so good.

In everyday life, as in art, we are our best selves when we embrace our unique totality and accept those of others. I am happiest when I’m being authentic. We all are.

“He who knows others is wise; he who knows himself is enlightened.” ― Lao Tzu

“Explore yourself in silent contemplation. You will find a breathtaking person you were completely unaware about.” ― Hiral Nagda

“The closer you come to knowing that you alone create the world of your experience, the more vital it becomes for you to discover just who is doing the creating.” ― Eric Micha’el Leventhal

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

Posted on Leave a comment

Total Eclipse of the Sun

My brother, his wife, and The Total Stranger

Today there will be a total solar eclipse! And, weather permitting, it will be viewable across a nice swath of the U.S. A great occasion and a thing well worth viewing. I won’t be able to see it this time around, but I did host a little watch party on August 21, 2017, when we were able to see the totality right from my backyard.

I invited my brother, his wife and my friend Bean to come and stay. Surprisingly, my son had called from New York to say a young woman he knew had been clamoring to see it and so he asked if she could come here, too. I agreed reluctantly, since our house is tiny but I thought, Cole’s friend . . . When she got in touch and I’d said yes, I told my son his friend was coming. “Oh, she’s not my friend,” he said. He’d met her briefly somewhere and the subject had come up. After that my friend Bean and I privately referred to her as The Total Stranger (TTS for short).

Oliver got out his cool telescope.

I have no photos of the sun/moon, as the ones I did take were pretty pathetic. Anyway, the few moments of totality were so stunning, so otherworldly, as to toss out all thoughts of photo-taking. One wanted just to have eyes on the sky for those brief seconds.

A total solar eclipse and a partial one can barely even be compared. The totality, even though you’re expecting it, is shocking, amazing, and sudden. The natural world’s response is immediate, too, as insects immediately change the course of their singing and chattering.

I’m not even sure why I’ve chosen to write about this, as words fail me. Look to The Marginalian for a reference to Annie Dillard’s words, instead. She wrote, “Usually it is a bit of a trick to keep your knowledge from blinding you. But during an eclipse it is easy. What you see is much more convincing than any wild-eyed theory you may know.” Please do click the link above for more, though.

To celebrate the occasion, I baked an eclipse cake!

I hope if you missed out on the 2017 event you’ll get to see this one. It’s a once in a lifetime treat (even if you get to see it twice). You might like to check out the very fun They Might Be Giants song, “Why Does the Sun Shine?” before or after. I played it more than once during our little party, for the edification of family, friend, and Total Stranger.

Virginia Woolf wrote, on seeing a total eclipse in 1927: “How can I express the darkness? It was a sudden plunge, when one did not expect it; being at the mercy of the sky; our own nobility; the druids; Stonehenge; and the racing red dogs; all that was in one’s mind.”

Well, I am no Virginia Woolf, but I’ve been pondering the greatness of the words “totality” and “eclipse” lately. I’m hoping to write something pithy about the various implications of the word “totality” that eclipses my writing here, for next week’s letter. Wink wink, see what I did there?

“The clouds I can handle, but I can’t fight with an eclipse.” ― Stephenie Meyer, Eclipse

“In the deep sky where there had been a sun, we saw a ring of white silver; a smoking ring, and all the smokes were silver, too; gauzy, fuming, curling, unbelievable. And who had ever seen the sky this color! Not in the earliest morning or at twilight, never before had we seen or dreamed this strange immortal blue in which a few large stars now sparkled as though for the first time in creation.” ― Elizabeth Enright, Doublefields

“I’d seen a great many partial eclipses, but a partial eclipse has the same relation to a total eclipse as flirting with a man does to marrying him.” – Annie Dillard

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

Posted on Leave a comment

Poetry Share

April is National Poetry Month and I think we should all celebrate it with aplomb, like the little girl pictured on this year’s National Poetry Month poster.

There are already loads of organized things one can find online for celebrating National Poetry Month, including Poem In Your Pocket Day, whose title I love but whose date I have found impossible to pin down. Let’s all just have a Poetry Share. I hope you’ll join me. Type up, copy, or write out a favorite poem or line, or many different ones, and print them out. Then start spreading them around. Go to a hospital parking lot and stick uplifting poems on windshields. Put a few in your favorite Little Free Library. Stick one into a library book you’re returning. Hand one to a friend or friendly stranger. Leave one on the table at your lunch spot. Chalk a short poem or line on a sidewalk. Email a favorite poem to someone you know or post one on social media. Add a favorite line to the bottom of your email. Wherever you go, spread some joy with poetry. Our troubled world needs it desperately.

If your idea of fun is to be secretive, do that. If you like the thought of handing a favorite poem to friends you see, do that. Maybe you’d take a few to your book club. Perhaps your book club would have a poetry exchange. You could host a poetry party, with collaborative poetry like Folding Poems, magnetic poetry, and poetry party favors. There are endless things to do. We all have words, right? And we can all put them together in fun or interesting ways. Don’t say No, not me. We can all do this. Whatever you choose to do, let’s just spread positivity via poetry this April.

I don’t take credit for this idea. A few years ago, Missouri’s then Poet Laureate asked people to do it all year long. Or maybe just haiku? I forget. I loved the idea at the time, but I never managed to do much. This year, I will.

Poem In Your Pocket Day shares this goal, too–on either April 18th or April 29th, depending where you look. Pinterest offers lots of ideas for it. I love the idea of celebrating poetry, poets, and words all month long, if not always. Sign up to receive a poem every day in your Inbox! Write silly little haikus! Or serious ones. Let’s make a vow to read, write, copy, and share poems this April, during this month meant to elevate poems and poets.

“Painting is poetry that is seen rather than felt, and poetry is painting that is felt rather than seen.” ― Leonardo da Vinci

“One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture, and, if it were possible, to speak a few reasonable words.” ― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Wilhelm Meister’s Apprenticeship

“There is not a particle of life which does not bear poetry within it” ― Gustave Flaubert

“Poetry is a life-cherishing force. For poems are not words, after all, but fires for the cold, ropes let down to the lost, something as necessary as bread in the pockets of the hungry.” ― Mary Oliver, A Poetry Handbook

“Every adjective and adverb is worth five cents. Every verb is worth fifty cents.” ― Mary Oliver, A Poetry Handbook

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

Posted on Leave a comment

Equanimity Arising

Can you call it “equanimity” if it comes and goes?

I had a day recently at the beginning of which there was a storybook sky and at the end of which I marveled at my own equanimity. I had a relaxed, open attitude to the whole day and everything in it. Boy, it felt good! I went to pickleball, had fun playing, enjoyed all the people there, and then, somehow (obviously, because I’m 72), pulled a muscle in my hip. Ooh. Played another game even though it hurt and then thought I’d better stop. I called my Super Fabulous Magical chiropractor and as always, got an appointment for later that day.

If it’s not close to dinnertime, Miles is the picture of equanimity.

My hip hurt but I felt peachy, nonetheless. I knew it would pass, as do all my little injuries. I had things to do and I did them. I went to the bank and had a pleasant little chat with the young teller. At home I watched, mesmerized, as a fallen tree was being removed from my neighbor’s carport roof with some kind of giant cutting-and-picking-up contraption. Fascinating! My life felt good.

Then I went to see Mr. Magic, the chiropractor. That was fun, too. A lady brought her little dog in with her. Everyone seemed to be in jolly moods. Mr. Magic did all the adjustments, told me not to sit, to ice and then stretch twice a day. “Stretch how?” I asked. “Use that sheet I gave you.” In all these years I had/have no memory of ever having received a sheet. “Well, could you give me the sheet again?” When he handed it to me, he said, “In ten years when you come in with this same thing, I’ll give you another sheet.” Fun.

I marvel still at that day. I had to stand up for piano lessons. No matter. At little Henry’s lesson, there was the usual fidgeting and messing with the pedals, which I have asked him a hundred times not to do. “The piano is not a toy!” I’d said, again and again. On this day he was doing it again and I was asking him not to. Then he says, while fiddling, “Is this the one that’s just for fun?” Aiyiyi! “No! The piano is not a toy!” I was flat out amused, though. Enjoying this little cutie pie. The whole day long, everything seemed so easy, as if me and my life were sailing along on a tranquil lake in a small blue boat. I marveled. I have marveled at it again and again.

Especially since it was followed by several days of moods, worry about my dogs, and grumbling. Anger with the bank. Wishing for sun when the day was gloomy. Wanting not to do my tax prep. Etc. So if equanimity is defined as “evenness of mind especially under stress” and/or “general balance and harmony,” does one day count? Even though the day included a pulled muscle, discomfort, and inconvenience (but also Henry)?

I think, as Jack Kornfield says, equanimity can “arise.” I let it arise on that great day full of ordinary things. I did do that. Humans are just not capable of letting it arise all the time. Are we? Well, maybe some are. But are they, really? A very few might be. But do you know one? I don’t. Even the Dalai Lama gets rattled. Jack Kornfield too, probably.

“Those who are doomed to become artists are seldom blessed with equanimity. They are tossed to drunken heights, only to be brought down into a sludge of headachy despair; their arrogance gives way to humiliation at the next curve of the switchback.” – Patrick White, Flaws in the Glass

“To cultivate equanimity we practice catching ourselves when we feel attraction or aversion, before it hardens into grasping or negativity.” – Pema Chodron

“Equanimity arises when we accept the way things are.” – Jack Kornfield

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

Posted on Leave a comment

Taxes

Doesn’t it seem rather uncivilized and frankly ugly that income tax reporting happens on April 15th? Or in April at all? In the middle of spring?? It does to me.

Who wants to think about money and expenses and unreported tips and foreign income and grantors and transferors when one should be traipsing through the wildflowers? Not me. Okay, taxes are one of those “get to” things I wrote about earlier, because if I didn’t have enough income to even report, I’d be pretty darn poor. However, why couldn’t this heinous task be set for, say, November 15th, after which we’d celebrate Thanksgiving, being thankful for all we have, including income?

My sister, a CPA, has been my tax accountant for many years. She did this for me out of love, in exchange for a few greeting cards and perhaps a box of chocolate covered pretzels (which I often forgot). Now, however, she’s retired. A local friend agreed to take me on as a client. I asked him for a deadline for all my info and materials and he suggested March 15th. Okay. But then he stretched that to the last week of March. Uh-oh. Never remove a deadline from a deadline-dependent artist type who hates numbers and figures. Now I’ve hardly begun. The pile of papers on the dining room table grows more menacing by the day.

I like to think that Mary Oliver and I would have been right in step with each other, with regard to taxes. She wrote a poem titled “Percy Speaks While I Am Doing the Taxes.” I’ve copied it for you, below. Surely she, like I, would like to have simply tossed all her receipts into a box and handed that over to the hapless accountant. “Do your worst, fine fellow! I can’t be bothered. I have spring to attend to.” Surely she, like I, would so much rather have been out in the woods somewhere with a small dog, sending love and kisses to the baby wildflowers, tiny shoots of green, and blue blue sky. As my sister, too, would rather have done for all those years. Now she is released from my 1040, Schedule C, Business Use of Home, 1099, etc., etc. Whereas I will ever and always, in Just-spring, have a pile of papers on the dining room table, mocking me.

I add now, to my list of desired household employees, in addition to the“dreamy-eyed gardener,” a bright-eyed, cheerful bookkeeper.

Percy Speaks While I Am Doing the Taxes – Mary Oliver

First of all, I do not want to be doing this.
Second of all, Percy does not want me
to be doing this.
bent over the desk like a besieged person
with a dull pencil and innumerable lists
of numbers.

Outside the water is blue, the sky is clear,
the tide rising.
Percy, I say, this has to be done. This is
essential. I’ll be finished eventually.

“Keep me in your thoughts,” he replies. “Just because
I can’t count to ten doesn’t mean
I don’t remember yesterday, or anticipate today.
I’ll give you ten more minutes,” and he does.
Then shouts—who could resist—his
favorite words: Let’s go!

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

Posted on 2 Comments

Early Spring

Spring Beauty, so very early!

Oddly, I find the early spring we are experiencing not only unsettling but a little sad. Of course I adore spring! And winter is my least favorite time of year. But I do live in a land of four seasons and this year we barely had a winter at all.

There are things both natural and unnatural about this early spring that bother me. On the unnatural side, there is, of course, global warming. We are wrecking the natural order of things and that is very sad. All kinds of terrible things are happening across the globe because of what we humans have done and are still doing to this planet that is our home.

Toothwort, too, so early!

On the natural side, there’s time slipping away. Being a woman of a certain age, I am acutely aware of the passage of time. I look out my windows now, in early March, and see lots of green already. Oddly chagrined rather than joyous yesterday, I felt ashamed to actually feel a little sad about it. This is not just a sweet little blip in the middle of winter. I’ve always loved those. No, it’s done, it’s over; and we haven’t put in our dues with ice and snow and freezing toes and fingers yet. Two weeks only of it, I’d say. We’ve paid almost nothing for the rewards of spring.

Wildflowers, bulbs and flowering trees are already doing what they do so well.

Shouldn’t I be reveling in it? Crusty Old Winter’s zoomed away in a rush without even a sly goodbye. Yet this year I’m not yelling, Good riddance!

No. For I have passed another winter on Earth. How many more will I have? So I feel a bit unsettled and not quite as celebratory as usual.

But signs of spring are signs of spring, and color and blue skies and the cheerful little flowers are always lovely and welcome. I just hope they don’t disappear in a rush because summer’s landed too soon! I like FOUR seasons. Four. This is where I live, in Four Seasons Land, which is located on Earth, which we need to somehow protect. Sigh. So many things to fix.

“If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant: if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome.” ― Anne Bradstreet

“That is one good thing about this world . . . there are always sure to be more springs.” ― L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Avonlea

” . . . always
it’s
Spring)and everyone’s
in love and flowers pick themselves”
― e.e. cummings, Collected Poems

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

Posted on Leave a comment

Readiness

My new Fitbit now gives a Readiness Score that tells each day how ready your body is for strenuous activity. I have no idea how accurate it is, only that it’s based on what you did the day before, how your heart rate varied, and what kind of sleep you just had. Today, for example, Fitbit suggested to me that with my Readiness Score of 78, I could try for even more Zone Minutes (fat burn, cardio and peak).

But what if we gave ourselves a Readiness Score each morning and what if Zone Minutes meant moments of contentment, ease, and happiness?

I’m thinking Readiness could be a score from 1-100 based on how ready we feel to meet the day and its various demands, considering the weather and any other mitigating factors. We might shoot for 60 Zone Minutes and call that a very good day. Or maybe 15 or 20 minutes would be the goal, depending upon circumstances.

Today, for example, I do feel rested and energized for all the things on my agenda. Rested is key. The weather is unseasonably warm and sunny, so a leisurely walk with my dog and maybe later with a friend will be not only pleasant but easy. I can well imagine some Zone Minutes of contentment happening then. I have the chance to play pickleball indoors, whereas it’s a little windy to play outside today. I am free of injuries, so I can easily do that, most likely racking up quite a few Happy Zone Minutes. I have my MerryThoughts letter to write and I have this great idea for it. I have chocolate on hand. I am planning NOT to tackle income tax or sales tax on such a beautiful day, so I feel positive and happy about this day.

I’d give myself a Readiness Score of 91. I suppose it could be higher but I’m keeping it there just because. Well, Rufus is a worry with all his health problems, and then there’s The World. So a score of 100 would actually seem immoral.

If I were planning to work on my income tax or sales tax today, then I might not give myself such a high score. Or if I’d woken up tired, achey, allergic or even sick, I could see my score falling considerably. The whole thing would be meaningless if I gave myself some ridiculously high score every day.The point is, if we take a realistic approach to the day, keeping expectations in line with what is possible, and totting up those minutes of contentment, happiness, laughter, and even joy, well, then we might a) approach the day in a better frame of mind and b) end the day having reached the apogee of what could reasonably have been expected. Another successful day, with a Zone Minute goal met!

So what is your Readiness Score for today?

Before Dawn – Kay Foley

Up before dawn I make a vow
to do so again. And again.
From now on all the days
to have the fullness of the hours
sunrise to sunset and beyond
the rise of the moon
the popping out
of the stars
the unfolding of the day
a sheet of cloth opened out
layer by layer to make one
complete piece upon which
anything may be laid.
If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”
Posted on Leave a comment

Tiny Things

I vowed this year that I would submit something to every exhibition our local arts organization sponsors. I love the director and I appreciate all she has done for me and other artists, young and old, new and seasoned. She is great. And the Art League needs support.

I thought the latest exhibit, Tiny Things, would be easy. I had a million ideas! Assemblage? Book? Tiny abstract? The world was my oyster!

I really wanted to submit this one but the frame is 10″ x 10″, not 8″ x 8″. Poopoo!

Well, the instructions stated plainly that the piece had to be no larger than 8″ x 8″, including frame. Easy. But having made several nice tiny abstracts, I struggled with framing. Struggled and then actually failed. I bought two frames that were both too big, thinking somehow that they were within the limitation. Discovered way late that they were not. Submissions were due the following day. I gave up.

The next day came and I hadn’t quite given up. I went out searching, again, for some way to frame them nicely. Nothing. Gave up all over again. Then I remembered I had an older piece of the right size. I put a wire on it and took it downtown. Done! Challenge met! So I’m happy about that.

My submission

Challenges and especially, meeting them, are so good for us. They give us new ways to think about what we normally do and new ways of doing. They help us make new connections in our brains. (That’s what I like to think, anyway.) And they’re good for self-esteem. Yes! I met that challenge! What’s next?

When I turned 60, I set myself the challenge of doing sixty new things during the year. Then there was the Poem a Day for 49 Days challenge that turned into more than a year of daily poems. More recently, I did 100 Days of Meditation. All of these have helped me grow. Now I’ve made this pretty tiny vow for 2024. How could I give up so early in the year?

The next exhibit will really test me. Still Life. Aiyiyi! Still Life? Me?? I honestly cannot imagine that I will do well with that. Better start now. But undoubtedly this, too, will stretch me in good ways. Perhaps Still Life will become my new favorite genre of art. Doubtful. But anything is possible!

“Wisdom starts when you know yourself. You will realise that everything aligns itself perfectly when you live your truth, break limiting habits and challenge yourself daily.” ― Itayi Garande

“Don’t live the same day over and over again and call that a life. Life is about evolving mentally, spiritually, and emotionally.” ― Germany Kent

“Challenge yourself. Try to shed an outgrown identity.” ― Sonia Choquette, The Psychic Pathway

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

Posted on Leave a comment

Handwriting

The New York Times recently ran an article titled “We Could All Use a Little Snail Mail Right Now.” Naturally, I jumped on it! I have more than once said with chagrin that the greeting card business–my business–is dying. Self-fulfilling prophecy or a depressing realization?

According to the NY Times article, the average household receives only 10 pieces of personal mail per year. Aiyiyi!! If true, that is even worse than I thought.

My stash of card and letter writing supplies

But according to the article, choosing a card, picking out a stamp, and writing by hand is not only good for the person who receives the card, but can be good for you, too. It just feels good to do something nice for another person. Sending a card is one of those small, feel-good tasks. As Hallmark says, “It’s the biggest little thing you can do!” It shows the receiver that you’ve spent a little extra time and effort for them.

And writing by hand is beneficial, as well. Julia Cameron, in her wonderful book, The Artist’s Way, is adamant about the benefits of writing by hand. She suggests that we write at least three pages by hand every morning, a practice otherwise known as her Morning Pages. She claims that writing by hand does much more for us, internally, than does writing on a keyboard.

In another article, The Times cites research that finds that children who learn early to write by hand may learn better, retain what they read, and might even be more creative. “Children not only learn to read more quickly when they first learn to write by hand, but they also remain better able to generate ideas and retain information. In other words, it’s not just what we write that matters — but how.”

Funnily enough, a friend just texted me about taking a walk today and I replied that I wanted to finish writing this letter first. She suggested, facetiously I’m sure, that I have AI write up a first draft for me. There’s yet another fly in the ointment, perhaps a subject for another day. Do we really need a tool that takes us even further from our own authenticity, our words, our thoughts, our interiority? I don’t think so. It’s a little heartbreaking for me to have one customer after another ask, “Does it say something inside? I never know what to say.” I always reply, “They are blank inside, ready for your loving words.”

Having said all of this, I will admit that I don’t send cards quite as often as I plan to. So there. But you know, one can always do better.

“My spelling is Wobbly. It’s good spelling but it Wobbles, and the letters get in the wrong places.” ― A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

“. . . the beauty and nobility, the august mission and destiny, of human handwriting.” ― George Bernard Shaw, Pygmalion

“Handwriting is the garden of the sciences.” ― Abu Dulaf

“Writing longhand opens up and exercises parts of the brain that keyboarding doesn’t. It does get more uncomfortable as we age; then again, it wasn’t all that comfortable when we were learning it – remember? Handwriting is a lovely thing, though, with practice.” – Julia Cameron

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

Posted on Leave a comment

Saving Up

Something about a palm tree says luxury to me.

I had a little getaway last weekend, with a friend, to South Padre Island. Palm trees, sand, ocean, and sun in the middle of winter. To me that is something quite luxurious, even though it was really a modest trip. But how did I manage to do it? I have never been great at saving money, budgeting (ugh), or planning in advance. I don’t even like thinking about money, banking, bookkeeping, any of that stuff.

Several years ago, I found in a magazine the idea of saving your $5 bills throughout the year towards a flight to someplace warm in winter. Well, of course I began right away. It’s fun! It is a painless way of saving a little money. I count up those fives every now and then, marveling. And it beats throwing away $5 on Powerball, in the hope of becoming a millionaire overnight and then being miserable for the rest of my life. I do not need millions of dollars clogging up my brain and I do not crave a $2000/night resort stay or a $100,000 trip on that gigantic new cruise ship. How could one ever feel that these things were actually worth it?

So I had saved $600 in a little handmade box an artist friend gave me many years ago. This money paid for my hotel, meals, etc., since the flight was already covered by my credit card points. La!

Sunrise on our last morning

So that painless saving netted me an Artist Retreat with a friend, in a warm place, on an island, with palm trees, sand, ocean, gorgeous sunsets and sunrises, and truly fabulous seafood that didn’t cost an arm OR a leg. A modest little getaway, but just right.

Now I’m saving up those moments on the sand, watching the sea roll in and out, those beautiful sunrises and sunsets, and all the rest of it in my brain for a cold, dreary day like today, when I can look at my photos or into my memory and have it all again. The platter of raw oysters, the modest little table at the edge of a patio with the sun going down over the ocean, the warm sun on my shoulders–all of these things can be called up again and again whenever I need them.

Saving up a little bit of money and loads of memories.

“Kate never had any money, but she loved to save it. When she was ninety-three her youngest daughter took her to a dollar store where she found an elevated tray filled with tiny aluminum percolators, one-cuppers. The frank and ethical enterprise attached a notice informing its customers that these percolators did not work. They were only 5 cents, so Kate bought two of them anyway.”― Donald Hall, A Carnival Of Losses

“Saving money is often associated with sacrifice. However, you can associate it with freedom rather than limitation if you realize one simple truth: living below your current means increases your future means.”― James Clear, Atomic Habits

“Wealth consists not in having great possessions but in having few wants.” – Epictetus

“He who buys what he does not need steals from himself.”- Swedish Proverb

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”