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Square Foot of Wonders

Yesterday I was sitting out on my stoop, actually almost in my driveway, waiting for a friend to arrive for a walk and from there I made a wonderful, though not really earth-shattering, discovery.

I had just listened to a short meditation by Jeff Warren called “Whole Body Listening.” Very nice. And it was a gorgeous autumnal day. Bright and crisp, with a deep blue sky. I was lying on my back in the sun, right there by my driveway, eyes open to my neighbor’s tree against that blue sky and as so often happens, was inspired to take a photo looking straight up. Lovely.

Then the magic happened. I was further inspired by the light and the colors to take photos all around me, from just right there, without getting up or finding a different vantage point, just right from where I was (reminding me of Pema Chodron’s lovely book, Start Where You Are). There were so many beautiful little things right there around me, in that very humble spot, the sidewalk at the edge of my cracked driveway. Each way I turned my head I found something picture worthy, at least, to my mind.

And isn’t that the simple truth? That anywhere we are, there are little humble things, pretty or interesting things, worthy of our attention and gratitude. You might even say worthy of love and you might even call them wonders. All these unassuming things everywhere around us, ripe for the eye’s picking. If you’re game for looking, for seeing, for spending a little time in a way that others might call pointless, and you don’t have any particular expectations, you will be rewarded, practically anyplace you find yourself.

I found this fossil rock years ago and put it in my messy “rock garden.”

I wasn’t looking for New England fall colors or Rocky Mountain views. I was just looking. Looking and seeing while sitting still in that simple spot. And it was such a pleasure. It just goes to show that simple pleasures, and even wonders, abound, as long as we’re open to them.

I had an aching back that day, too, which is why I lay down to listen to that meditation in the first place and why I saw the beguiling sky and tree above when I opened my eyes. That aching back gave me such an opportunity. I truly believe opportunities, too, are all around us and we need to seize upon them whenever we can.

What might you see just outside your door, at the end of the sidewalk, or just by the nearby curb? Wonders, I’ll bet. What little bodily grievance might lead you to something wonder-full?

“I have learned over a period of time to be almost unconsciously grateful–as a child is–for a sunny day, blue water, flowers in a vase, a tree turning red. I have learned to be glad at dawn and when the sky is dark. Only children and a few spiritually evolved people are born to feel gratitude as naturally as they breathe, without even thinking. Most of us come to it step by painful step, to discover that gratitude is a form of acceptance.” ― Faith Baldwin, Many Windows, Seasons of the Heart

“I hope these simple things are what I forever love about life, for then I will be happy no matter where I find myself.”― R. YS Perez, I Hope You Fall in Love

“When simple is more than enough, you will feel happy more than enough!”― Mehmet Murat Ildan

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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Into Thin Air

On my recent trip to Rocky Mountain National Park I worried about the thin air at elevation. Would I be able to do what I wanted to do while there, or would I have to stay back at our beautiful rental house?

The RMNP website offers this explanation about breathing at elevation: “At higher elevations there is less air pressure which results in the oxygen molecules being more dispersed. Until your body adjusts, it will struggle to take in enough oxygen. This can result in shortness of breath, as well as headache, fatigue, loss of appetite, and even nausea. It is not uncommon to experience breathlessness with even a simple walk down the sidewalk or up a flight of stairs, even for those who are very fit.”

I did struggle, but not so much that I could not go and do. I quickly learned that I needed to pause to breathe, sometimes often, and I had to let the struggle be okay. Isn’t that the teaching in meditation, though? Pause, be present, and breathe. Focus on the breath.

I love that the altitude forces you to be mindful of your breath, of oxygen, and of the present moment. Right now, in this moment, breathe. Be mindful of this life force–air–oxygen–and take it in as well as your body and lungs allow. Go at your own pace. Breathe, as suits your body.

Breathing is not a thing to take for granted, especially there, but anywhere. But there, at those high elevations, you really have to pay attention to it. The altitude, the mountains, become a teacher, asking you to be mindful of the breath, of your body, of your very basic needs and abilities, of your surroundings. Be present. Breathe.

I found this all so interesting. The meditation teachers always have you “focus on the breath.” Susan Salzberg speaks of “just this one breath.” And the mountains do, too.

Teachers everywhere. Thank you.

“If you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath.”― Amit Ray, Om Chanting and Meditation

“Breath is the bridge which connects life to consciousness, which unites your body to your thoughts. Whenever your mind becomes scattered, use your breath as the means to take hold of your mind again.” ― Thich Nhat Hanh, The Miracle of Mindfulness

“The Tantric sages tell us that our in-breath and out-breath actually mirror the divine creative gesture. With the inhalation, we draw into our own center, our own being. With the exhalation, we expand outward into the world.” ― Sally Kempton, Awakening Shakti

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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Creative Block

“I don’t know how to paint,” I recently told both my son and a good friend. The friend responded, “No painter ever in the history of art has ever thought that, right?” That’s right. Not Van Gogh or any of those others. No one.

So I’ve been struggling with three paintings I’m been working on. Each new thing I try seems to go badly. Or I’ll be happy with one and a few hours later, I think it’s absolutely terrible. A dog’s breakfast, I’d say if I was British. Rubbish. Deserves to be thrown into the bin. Or tossed on the fire. I don’t even have a fire. What then?

And then there are other things. The heat and other things. It’s been a general miasma over here the last little while.

As a result, I’ve been pulling out the old standbys I use to lift my mood. Went to the gym, finally. On the track, I listened to a Gratitude Walk, which turned out to be more like Interval Training with just a hint of gratitude. Kicked my butt but I liked it. Slipped back into the funk after a couple of hours, though. Later concluded I do not know how to paint. Went to the gym the following day, with music on the iPod. Nice but then I required an Epsom salts bath, a nap, and chocolate. Gave my paintings the stink eye.

This is the painting my son wants for Christmas.

Today, however, we had a lovely, breezy, cool morning. I took Miles to Stephens Park and we walked around the lake, which was absolutely lovely. And then I went back out on my own, through the neighborhood, with Ceasar Happily aka Ceasar F. Barajas, a meditation/yoga teacher, narrating “Walk and Chill” on my phone. Oh my Lord! Lovely. Wonderful voice, amazing energy, beautifully encouraging words. And then it started raining. I love being out in the rain and so this was an added bonus. And then Ceasar says, “Now imagine the miracle that is currently happening. You are a walking universe, filled with energetic channels of light and love and electricity, currently walking on an earth that is in the midst of an even bigger universe.” Whoa. And more where that came from.

Okay, you tell me how a person can remain in a funk while hearing those and many other words during a walk in the rain at the end of a very hot week during which that person mistakenly concluded that she does not know how to paint. At all. Pish-posh. I am a walking universe! And I think painting is included in my universe. Funk lifted.

And then my son calls and says he wants for Christmas TWO of my recent paintings. This makes me very, very happy.

“When I have a creative block, I take walks. I like to see what shapes stick out – so many legs rushing by at once, it can seem abstract. I don’t need to see great art to get stirred up. Music does that for me more easily.” — Caio Fonseca

“If you hear a voice within you saying, ‘You are not a painter,’ then by all means paint, boy, and that voice will be silenced.” — Vincent van Gogh

“You can’t use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have.” — Maya Angelou

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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100 Day Projects Part II

A hundred and two days ago, I decided to meditate for 100 days in a row. I just finished.

I wrote a previous letter about 100 Day Projects. I said that I was planning to start a new something and to make it last for 100 days. I wasn’t sure what it would be but I imagined that it might include pen and paper. Wrong.

I say I meditated “100 days in a row” but I did forget twice. I just simply forgot. I forgot on Day 66, started up again the next day and forgot again on day 87 and restarted again. I was quite disappointed with myself for forgetting, especially that first time. Old Lady Brain. I had also forgotten to lock the back door when I left the house that day, despite the fact that I’d been quite bothered when my son said I leave it unlocked all the time. But it turns out that omissions and interruptions fit right in with the practice of meditation.

Beginning again after being distracted, they tell me, is the essence of meditation. Perfect! Yay me!

Since I am still learning, I listen to teachers on the 10% Happier app and I meditate with their guidance. Sharon Salzberg said, in a recent lesson (after my two omissions), “We say that the moment you realize you’ve been distracted is the magic moment. Because that’s the moment we have the chance to be really different. Not judge ourselves, not put ourselves down, but simply let go and begin again. If you have to let go and begin again thousands of times, it’s fine.”

Well, her words were magic to me. Loving, kind, accepting. Sharon says beginning again is the practice. La! This means that I am all good and my meditation is full of magic moments, as I begin again and again and again.

Beginning again after being distracted, they tell me, is the essence of meditation. Perfect! Yay me!

Since I am still learning, I listen to teachers on the 10% Happier app and I meditate with their guidance. Sharon Salzberg said, in a recent lesson (after my two omissions), “We say that the moment you realize you’ve been distracted is the magic moment. Because that’s the moment we have the chance to be really different. Not judge ourselves, not put ourselves down, but simply let go and begin again. If you have to let go and begin again thousands of times, it’s fine.”

Well, her words were magic to me. Loving, kind, accepting. Sharon says beginning again is the practice. La! This means that I am all good and my meditation is full of magic moments, as I begin again and again and again.

So I’ve completed 100 days of meditation. This morning I did an unguided meditation and afterwards I thought that, since I’m still learning, I’d like to listen to one lesson with guided meditation each day and do one unguided meditation every day. Upping the ante. I’m not sure I’ll keep track of the days this time but I will still have the goal of a daily practice.

I feel very lucky to have access to all these wonderful teachers, thanks to the mind-boggling internet. There is so much out there that is good. Wonders never cease.

“It is never too late to start now.” ― Lailah Gifty Akita

“Every sunrise gives you an opportunity to begin again.” ― Debasish Mridha

“Begin again. Begin again. Every year, Every day, Every moment, Begin again.” Shellen Lubin

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”
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Process Painting

I just tried something I’d never heard of before. It’s called Process Painting, and it’s a combo of meditation and painting. I watched a brief demo by Patty Ripley in my online art group and I couldn’t wait to try it. It’s a process whereby you meditate and then paint, letting whatever comes up within you lead you. The aim is not to make a painting–but spiritual, personal growth. Well, this hits my two biggest things of late. As we all know, carpentry is not one of those. No, dummy! Meditation and painting!

Patty states: “I devote to the healing power of art. It isn’t about making the final product yet more about the process. It’s about connecting with the spirit within and channeling that. It’s about allowing the narrative to be fueled by emotion, sensation and landscape. All is welcome here.” It might sound woo-woo and it is. Right up my alley!

I bought some kids’ paints and poster board, taped two pieces together to make a nice big surface on my wall, and began. First, I listened to her meditation and then I let loose. I should say that my painting is normally fairly free to start with. But here, there is absolutely no imperative to show what you make or to make a pleasing painting or to follow any rules at all. The idea here, though, is to let anything at all come up from within you. Emotions, thoughts, reactions to the meditation, reactions to the colors and the paints, responses to whatever you’ve just put down. And then just follow.

I started with brushes, even skinny ones, which I normally avoid because of my shaky hands. But the paint was a lot like finger paint, so I started using my fingers. Much more fun and freeing.

And then I shut out the little voice that says one should not make the same mark again and again in a single painting, so I just went all out with circles. Circles circles circles! I love circles and I put them into my paintings all the time.

Why? Hmm. I had to think about this. Circles are unending, symbols of life and infinity. They seem to float, like bubbles, which are perfect and ephemeral (thank you, Lynn) and therefore precious; a treat; a gift. They are happy, simple shapes. They represent love (xo). They are happiness.

And there was more that I won’t go into because it was really just for me. Just as when you try it, it will be just for you. I will do it again. It was a beautiful, opening experience for me.

“Devoting to your energetic being will help you reconnect with the pure essence that you are.” – Patty Ripley

“This true essence is beyond the ego. It is fearless; it is free; it is immune to criticism; it does not fear any challenge. It is beneath no one, superior to no one, and full of magic, mystery, and enchantment.” – Deepak Chopra

“Magic happens here.” – Patty Ripley

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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Lovingkindness

Last week I completed the 15-session “Lovingkindness” meditation course by Sharon Salzberg on the 10% Happier app. It is so great. She is so great! I feel a noticeable difference in my daily life as a result and now I’m wanting to keep lovingkindness as my meditation focus going forward, at least for awhile. It is both simple and challenging. “May you be safe. Be happy. Be healthy. Live with ease.” The idea is to apply those four phrases first to yourself, then to another person and another and another, and finally, to all beings.

It was pretty easy to apply the phrases to myself and to someone I love or care about. Very easy! Of course I want me and my loved ones to be happy! Then she asks that you try focusing on someone you might just see in passing, don’t really know, whose name you might not even know. That, too, was easy enough to do. Then, a benefactor, someone who has helped you in some way. Sure, easy, as well. But then she asks that you try applying these phrases to a difficult person or someone who has hurt you in some way. Here is where the change really starts to take place. This is where the greatness begins. I experienced an immediate and profound shift, not just while meditating, but the next day, when I encountered a person who had hurt my feelings several times in the past and whom I had selfishly not forgiven.

I say “selfishly” but it can hardly be called selfish to make yourself miserable over a perceived hurt. It’s like, as is said, drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die. I was hurting myself by not forgiving.

Finally, Ms. Salzberg asks us to offer lovingkindness to all beings. I found that as long as I could avoid picturing certain world figures along with “all beings” I could do this, too. I know that the idea of wishing safety, happiness, health and ease on a few destructive, vengeful men who create havoc and tragedy in the world has merit. The thinking is that if these individuals were truly happy they would be nicer; thus, we should wish them well. I get it. I’m not there yet but I do get it.

But I can easily say to you, “May you be safe. Be happy. Be healthy. Live with ease.”

“Lovingkindness is so powerful because it reflects the truth of interconnection. If we don’t necessarily like somebody, we don’t need to spend time with them. But fundamentally, our lives are linked because all life is linked. We are part of an interconnected universe. We are all the traffic.” – Sharon Salzberg

“Of all the contemporary female Buddhist teachers, Sharon Salzberg is the most radically open, the one teacher I have met throughout the years who I can spend lots of time with, speaking about both the sacred and the mundane.” —bell hooks, author, professor, feminist, and social activist

“Love yourself. Then forget it. Then, love the world. ” ― Mary Oliver, Evidence

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. And if you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here on my blog.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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Walking As Reset

We sure have a lot to worry and fret about these days–our own health and whatever problems we might be having, challenges our friends and family members are facing (so numerous these days), and lately, the very serious, heavy and daunting news of the world. Although I am not at all a news hound, I can get overwhelmed by the little I read and hear in the news. This past week, whenever I’ve felt grumpy about the weather, my petty grievances, or my various silly irritations, I’ve been saying to myself, “You’re not in Ukraine.” It does help to put things in perspective, though it doesn’t solve anything. I know that right now, I am exceptionally lucky. Even though I have worries and fears, they are not for myself. I am lucky.

For me, walking outdoors is usually the antidote to any negative thoughts, worries, or fears I’m harboring. This is what helps me most to shake off a bad mood, even in the cold, and especially with a friend and/or a dog–but even on my own. I often walk alone or just with my sweet dog Miles. But I do, too, love to walk with friends. I remember a particular recent time when I had been indoors most of the day, getting more and more frustrated with my computer and technology in general, and I suddenly texted my neighbor for a walk. And she said yes! I rushed out into the street and waited for her. As I breathed in that cold, clear air I grew calmer and calmer. As if I was meditating. Just breathing. In with the good, out with the bad. Ahh.

And then off we went. Fast. We walk at a similar fast, energetic pace. Not jogging or even speed walking, but fast enough to feel it. Not too fast that we can’t talk, vent, and sometimes rant. That day I ranted and pretty soon we were both laughing. And then the sun was setting behind all the bare neighborhood trees and it was just beautiful.

When I got home I felt totally reset. My brain, my soul, my body, my day had all been reset. The button had been pressed. Such a blessed relief. Walking is the best. It doesn’t even have to be in nature or in any particular kind of spot. My son loves to walk all over New York City and when I go there, we walk and walk and walk. I suspect he gets the same beautiful benefits there. In with the good, out with the bad. Walking as meditation.

“Exploring the world is one of the best ways of exploring the mind, and walking travels both terrains.” ― Rebecca Solnit, Wanderlust: A History of Walking

“But the beauty is in the walking — we are betrayed by destinations.” ― Gwyn Thomas

“My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She’s ninety-seven now, and we don’t know where the heck she is.”― Ellen DeGeneres

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. And if you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems right here on my blog.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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Being Cheesy

I recently heard that there’s a saying in meditation that goes, “If you can’t be cheesy, you’ll never be free.” Wow. That really got me excited. I must be very free! I really can be cheesy, I feel. I read Tarot cards, especially to start a new year. Runes, too. I even have a rune tattoo. Bit of a regret on that, but oh well. But are these things cheesy or actually woo-woo? Hmm. That’s a hard one. I believe I’m pretty good at both, though my heart does draw the line at certain things in the woo-woo category.

But that is neither here nor there. Merriam-Webster defines cheesy as 1) “resembling or suggesting cheese especially in consistency or odor” (terribly literal, don’t you think?) and 2) “shabby, cheap.” It offers a whole slew of terrible synonyms for that second definition, e.g. dowdy, inelegant, tacky, tasteless, trashy, unfashionable, unstylish.

Clearly, this is not exactly what the meditation teachers are meaning (especially that bit about actual cheese). No. And regarding definition #2, in meditation you’re not supposed to be stylish to begin with! Hats, for example, are not worn, let alone truly fashionable top hats. In my opinion, meditators clearly mean being willing to do things that are, God forbid, not “cool” in the traditional sense, like hugging a perfectly beautiful tree or taking a yoga pose in the gate area of an airport. Wearing a Mad Hatter hat to greet one’s son at selfsame airport. Running up and down the little hills on a trail with arms spread out, playing “Airplane.” Singing “Good Night, Irene” or “Good Night, Lady” to one’s adult son every night before bed.

They mean being willing to risk looking or seeming silly, childlike, inelegant, woo-woo, naive, uncool, gullible or unrefined. And let’s just go on and say it–doing so for the greater good, i.e. for the sake of fun, a lighter heart, a new experience, vulnerability, intimacy, openness, perhaps even personal or spiritual growth–and thus becoming freer. That’s what I think, anyway.

So go ahead and hide an Easter basket for your adult son, husband, wife, lover! Go ahead and sing a little something at bedtime. Sing a little something to a perfect stranger! Find yourself a huggable tree and give it a loving embrace every time you pass by. Buy yourself a tube or two of Bathtub Soap Paint and have a ball in the tub. Or buy yourself an adorable plush snowman to have on your lap like a baby while you watch TV in the evening.

I would love to hear what you do that is cheesy.

“Do a loony-goony dance

‘Cross the kitchen floor,

Put something silly in the world

That ain’t been there before.”

― Shel Silverstein, A Light in the Attic

“‘Coolness’ is too transient to be of any real and meaningful, lasting significance, and it is often in great conflict with one being one’s most honest, most vulnerable self. ” ― Criss Jami, Healology

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. And if you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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Borrowing Joy

I began meditating in 2020. That is to say, I began meditating daily. I had been doing those Oprah and Deepak Chopra 21-day meditations or, rather, starting them (but usually not finishing) for several years. But I had never gotten into a meditation habit, and certainly not without music and someone leading it. Too impatient. Too many things I wanted to be doing. Too many thoughts and ideas. I cannot say what changed in me but somehow I now meditate for 25 minutes each morning. I put this in my list of positive things that came from Covid. Did it? I don’t know. But then a) I have no real schedule or place to be in the morning and b) it finally seemed like a pleasant and good thing to do when pleasant and good things to do were scarcer than usual.

One of the teachers I’ve listened to, Tuere Sala, on Ten Percent Happier, gave a short talk and led a meditation on “borrowing joy.” The idea is that if you are not feeling particularly joyful and you just can’t get there on your own, you think of someone, person or animal, that exhibits joy frequently. And then you “borrow” joy from this role model. You imagine yourself as that joyful being, you picture what joy looks like, embodied by that particular being, and you put yourself into that picture.

This was a no-brainer. Miles. My dog Miles is the most joyful being I know. Just this morning in the woods he went racing up to a total stranger, his body curving in excitement and his stumpy tail going a million miles a minute. She was, of course, charmed. And then later he did the same to another woman who marveled at what a wonderful, friendly, happy dog he is. “Yes, he is,” I said. And then, to be polite, added, “Thank you.” But I don’t know why. His joyful self is no reflection on me. He just is. He is exuberance and enthusiasm embodied. Merriment, gladness and delight. My beautiful Miles.

He had been given away by a breeder (he is rather large for a miniature poodle) to a woman who had adopted several children and who ultimately decided she could not keep him. The breeder had said that he had a gentle soul. Oh yes. The most gentle soul ever. He would rather do anything than be an alpha dog. He leans to go one way and I say, “Let’s go this way.” And his face lights up as if this is the best idea ever, as if to say, “Oh yes! That way is so much better! I love that way!”

He is the best role model a person could want for joie de vivre. The perfect being from whom to borrow joy. My Miles. You are welcome to borrow his joy, too, if you need some.

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. And if you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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Equanimity

Well, I had written a letter to send out on Thursday–but I’d written it the previous Sunday, the Sunday before the horrifying events of Wednesday, January 6th. I did not have the heart to send out what was a nice letter but wholly inappropriate to the day. And I felt mired in the muck of Wednesday, unable to write or accomplish anything.

I, like most people, have a very difficult time maintaining equanimity in the face of terrible events. Equanimity or “mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper, especially in a difficult situation” is challenging in the best of times. But in the face of huge, painful events, it’s easy for the healthiest of us to fall into despair, become stuck, angry, or depressed. There are those whose words we can look to, however, heroes who continued to rise above and keep going. Martin Luther King, Jr. was one of those. He once wrote,

“If you can’t fly, then run; if you can’t run, then walk; if you can’t walk, then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.”

And his life exemplified that very thing of moving forward, stalwart, in the face of racism, scorn, and danger.

On Thursday, in my despairing state, I listened to a short meditation on equanimity by Roshi Joan Halifax. As a mantra, she suggested the words strong back. I like this because it’s simple, understandable, and easily imagined as a symbol of strength of character, self-containment, and yes, equanimity. A strong back holds us upright, enables us to do many things, ensures that we remain rooted in who we are and what we believe. We don’t waver; we don’t collapse; we are who we are, regardless of what’s going on around us.

Soft front (gentle heart), strong back.

“Let no man pull you so low as to hate him.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

ENC 309 Tree Within

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. And if you like this letter, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

It’s nice for me to think of you out there, reading this. I hope we all weather this crisis with soft hearts while standing strong for what is right.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”