Tag: pickleball

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Connections

This is another of those times when I find I have several threads of thought that could be made into a letter for you, simply because life is constantly moving along, people stream through, words and phrases are spoken, and something in me gets sparked. Then I have words of my own to share.

Today I am choosing from among many things that have sailed by me, waving hello just during this past week. And so, with this well of riches, isn’t life amazing?

I went to my chiropractor on Thursday to get repairs done on my back, neck, and shoulder, all of which get bothered because I play something I love–pickleball. And that visit to my chiropractor’s office was, as sometimes happens, magical. a) He fixed me right up. b) We made each other laugh. c) I was able to buy an already cold, giant ice pack. And d) While I was paying, someone came up behind me and said, “Kay Foley, I haven’t seen you in years.” I turned to see a beautiful soul I met when I’d just started playing pickleball in 2015.

I stayed in my chiropractor’s office, ice pack on my back, to visit with her until she was called in. We reminisced about the old days of pickleball, when Open Play truly was open and we all played with each other. There were no groups and it was a pleasure to sit and visit with people from very different walks of life between games. She said, “Remember how much fun we had on Friday nights?” Oh yes. Yes, I so do. She had the same nostalgia for those days that I have.

Brooklyn Art Museum

I said, “You were so kind to me when I started playing.” She said, “You were so much fun!” I asked her how she and her husband (another very kind, lovely person) met. They dated for three years in high school and married at 19. She had been the head cheerleader and he, captain of the football team. They were prom king and queen. “Like a movie!” I exclaimed. And here they are, more than 60 years later, two lovelies. So much the opposite of my own life.

I am pretty sure we have very little in common, other than a love of pickleball and perhaps a desire to connect with others. She was a churchgoer, one of those that I was careful not to swear in front of, seemingly conservative, though I don’t really know that. I imagine that our social and political views are very different, but again, I’m only guessing.

So where am I going with this? It just struck me that while as a nation we are so very divided, as individuals we have so many ways that we connect, ways in which we can connect, regardless of our points of view. Just soul to soul. I think it’s remarkable. And it gets completely lost in the “issues” of the day. That, too, is remarkable. How does something so beautiful become so easily lost to us?

It doesn’t have to. We could make efforts to find those connections wherever we can. We could open our hearts. That’s where the plug-ins are, for the wild mix of connections we’re capable of. Just think what could happen. We could light up the whole world.

“We are like islands in the sea, separate on the surface but connected in the deep.” ― William James

“Invisible threads are the strongest ties.” ― Friedrich Nietzsche

“When we know ourselves to be connected to all others, acting compassionately is simply the natural thing to do. ” ― Rachel Naomi Remen

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”
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Poetry Share Update

I just thought I’d report on my progress with Poetry Share. You might recall that on April 1st, I had decided to celebrate National Poetry Month by sharing poems all around. I started that very day and it has been so much fun and quite surprising. I also asked you to join me. Please let me know how it’s gone for you, since I am certain that all of you have been very busy at it, as well.

So here is my report. I’ve shared copies of the following poems: Mary Oliver’s “Percy Speaks While I’m Doing the Taxes” (on April 15th) and “The Journey;” Seamus Heaney’s “Postscript;” Ellen Bass’ “Gate C-22;” e.e. cummings’ “[In Just]-“; Wendell Berry’s “The Peace of Wild Things;” “Summons” by Robert Francis; and “Yes,” by William Stafford. Is that all of them? I think there are more. In any case, I’ve given out almost 300 copies of these poems and now you can click on them and read them for yourself, so by now I bet I’m way ahead on the count. Not that it’s a contest, of course.

I was a little bit nervous to do it at first, as I began with pickleball players at my gym. The pickleball crowd is very mixed, people from all walks of life, and I had no idea how some of them would respond to being handed a poem. Boy, was I ever surprised! They loved them. No one turned me down, even though every day I was handing them out again. I did, of course, give out great ones and new ones each day. One of the guys, a self-described “bum,” who says he educated himself at the public library, brought a very nice poem he’d written, to share with everyone. Another said he also writes poetry and a couple of them declared that they thought poetry should rhyme, prompting a fun discussion.

I dropped poems into the Suggestion Box at the gym, and left a few lying on tables where you can sit and wait for someone or eat a snack. As I got bolder, I started handing the day’s poem to the attendant at the desk. Big happy smiles greeted me every time. I handed them to people who were collecting signatures for petitions outside of the gym or the Post Office or the Farmer’s Market or the library. Almost to a person, people’s faces lit up when I gave them. Only one guy, in line behind me at the Post Office on Tax Day, declined, even though we’d been chatting. He is the only one. It has been so much fun.

I’ve handed some to people I know that I’ve run into on the street but also to a few people I just met on a walk. Again, they were so happy to get them! I hung a new one each day on my mailbox for the postman. Once he saw that they were for him, he, too, looked forward to getting them, thanked me, and took them along with him.

I put some in Little Libraries and inside of books I was returning to the library. I put them in pants pockets and purses for sale at the thrift shop. I forgot about putting one in my tax check and have failed, oddly, to give them to good friends and adult piano students. But I’ve done pretty well and it has been one of the more fun things I’ve done. One of these days I’ll hand out a poem that I’ve written.

So tell me–have you shared any and if so, what happened? And if not, why not? It’s fun!

” . . . everyone here [in heaven] can read and write, the dogs in poetry, the cats and the others in prose.” – Billy Collins, from The Revenant

“Poetry is a deal of joy and pain and wonder, with a dash of the dictionary.” ~ Khalil Gibran

“Immature poets imitate; mature poets steal.” ~ T.S. Eliot

“I wish our clever young poets would remember my homely definitions of prose and poetry; that is prose; words in their best order; – poetry; the best words in the best order.” ~ Samuel Taylor Coleridge

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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Equanimity Arising

Can you call it “equanimity” if it comes and goes?

I had a day recently at the beginning of which there was a storybook sky and at the end of which I marveled at my own equanimity. I had a relaxed, open attitude to the whole day and everything in it. Boy, it felt good! I went to pickleball, had fun playing, enjoyed all the people there, and then, somehow (obviously, because I’m 72), pulled a muscle in my hip. Ooh. Played another game even though it hurt and then thought I’d better stop. I called my Super Fabulous Magical chiropractor and as always, got an appointment for later that day.

If it’s not close to dinnertime, Miles is the picture of equanimity.

My hip hurt but I felt peachy, nonetheless. I knew it would pass, as do all my little injuries. I had things to do and I did them. I went to the bank and had a pleasant little chat with the young teller. At home I watched, mesmerized, as a fallen tree was being removed from my neighbor’s carport roof with some kind of giant cutting-and-picking-up contraption. Fascinating! My life felt good.

Then I went to see Mr. Magic, the chiropractor. That was fun, too. A lady brought her little dog in with her. Everyone seemed to be in jolly moods. Mr. Magic did all the adjustments, told me not to sit, to ice and then stretch twice a day. “Stretch how?” I asked. “Use that sheet I gave you.” In all these years I had/have no memory of ever having received a sheet. “Well, could you give me the sheet again?” When he handed it to me, he said, “In ten years when you come in with this same thing, I’ll give you another sheet.” Fun.

I marvel still at that day. I had to stand up for piano lessons. No matter. At little Henry’s lesson, there was the usual fidgeting and messing with the pedals, which I have asked him a hundred times not to do. “The piano is not a toy!” I’d said, again and again. On this day he was doing it again and I was asking him not to. Then he says, while fiddling, “Is this the one that’s just for fun?” Aiyiyi! “No! The piano is not a toy!” I was flat out amused, though. Enjoying this little cutie pie. The whole day long, everything seemed so easy, as if me and my life were sailing along on a tranquil lake in a small blue boat. I marveled. I have marveled at it again and again.

Especially since it was followed by several days of moods, worry about my dogs, and grumbling. Anger with the bank. Wishing for sun when the day was gloomy. Wanting not to do my tax prep. Etc. So if equanimity is defined as “evenness of mind especially under stress” and/or “general balance and harmony,” does one day count? Even though the day included a pulled muscle, discomfort, and inconvenience (but also Henry)?

I think, as Jack Kornfield says, equanimity can “arise.” I let it arise on that great day full of ordinary things. I did do that. Humans are just not capable of letting it arise all the time. Are we? Well, maybe some are. But are they, really? A very few might be. But do you know one? I don’t. Even the Dalai Lama gets rattled. Jack Kornfield too, probably.

“Those who are doomed to become artists are seldom blessed with equanimity. They are tossed to drunken heights, only to be brought down into a sludge of headachy despair; their arrogance gives way to humiliation at the next curve of the switchback.” – Patrick White, Flaws in the Glass

“To cultivate equanimity we practice catching ourselves when we feel attraction or aversion, before it hardens into grasping or negativity.” – Pema Chodron

“Equanimity arises when we accept the way things are.” – Jack Kornfield

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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Abundance

I’m writing this on my 72nd birthday. I think I’ve said so before, but I always like to check my birthday number in terms of the mathematical principles of abundant, deficient, perfect, and prime.

Prime numbers, as everyone knows, cannot be divided by anything else. Perfect numbers’ divisors add up exactly to the number itself, and that is very cool. Deficient numbers are those whose factors (divisors) add up to less than the number itself, whereas abundant numbers’ factors add up to more than the number itself.

Well, 72 is incredibly abundant. Yeehah!! I take this as a sign that my 72nd year will be filled with abundance. And I am here to say that it has already begun.

Last night I went on a night bike ride sponsored by our Parks & Rec Department, called Kaleidospoke. It’s all about lights and color (much like the Lantern Festival in Taiwan). I went with three wonderful friends who had gifted me with my ticket to the event, including a “glow package” and s’mores by the lake. The ride is on a gravel trail with many bridges over the creek. The bridges are all lit up and there are lots of other lights poking out of the ground or otherwise lining the trail. Magical!

And then of course, starting out at 7:00 p.m., in the gathering light, sunset is happening over the lake. Ahh. So lovely. We, ourselves, were lit up, as were our bikes. We had things stuck on top of our helmets or dangling off of us. Lots of people had lit up their bike wheels. It was super fun, but especially so because of the company I was in. Already I’m feeling the abundance.

I won twice in a row at Mah Jongg on Friday, too! And on Wednesday when I returned, after years away to play pickleball at the gym, I won game after game. Strangers were happy to meet me. I learned the names of 15 new people! One (Chuck) said, “Come back. We want you here.” I told my son, “I’m Somebody there!” Abundance.

So the abundance is all happening.

Just to say, whenever I hit a year whose number is deficient, I ignore that, and I think you should, too. But the other three–woohoo!! And since it’s my birthday and I’m having a party, I’ll have to keep this one short.

I hope your year forward is also ABUNDANT!

“Keep your best wishes close to your heart and watch what happens”― Tony DeLiso, Legacy: The Power Within

“Plant seeds of happiness, hope, success, and love; it will all come back to you in abundance. This is the law of nature.” ― Steve Maraboli, Unapologetically You

“The truth is that there’s more than enough good to go around. There are more than enough creative ideas. There is more than enough power. There is more than enough love. There’s more than enough joy. All of this begins to come through a mind that is aware of its own infinite nature. There is enough for everyone. If you believe it, if you can see it, if you act from it, it will show up for you. That’s the truth.” ― Michael Beckwith

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. If you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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Losses

My pickleball community just lost one of its best loved members. At this writing, it’s not even been 12 hours. We are, as a group and as individuals, immersed in this loss right now and I am hard pressed to think or write about anything else. Life sure does turn on a dime. I cannot very well write about nature or my dogs or anything else at all today.

Dick was a truly beautiful person. Oh, you hear that said about people all the time. But he really was one of those people that everyone loves. And I don’t think I’m stretching anything or hurting anyone’s feelings to say that he was, hands-down, the most beloved person in our community, having just joined us three years ago. Always joking, always fun to play with or against, and a very good player, too. Plus, he was adorable! One day when he was coming off the court and I was going on, he said as he passed, “I saw in the news that Hallmark is going out of business. The article specifically stated that you and your cards were the reason.”

For maybe ten years I have said I only want to live to be 82. And then Dick showed up. He was 82 then. He moved like a young guy. I was flabbergasted. I asked him where he had come from, etc., and he said he and his wife live here but had been wintering in Arizona. Oh, well, that explained it. Those people in Arizona are crazy over pickleball. They play all the time. “So you’ve been playing out there for a long time?” No, he said, he only just started playing. “You played tennis, though?” No. “Racquetball?” No. “Ping pong?” Nope. He just took up pickleball in his 80s and played like a young guy.

So that’s great, but the truly wonderful thing about Dick was his fun-loving personality. If you snuck in a clever dink that he couldn’t get to, he’d give you the stink eye, big time. It was all in fun, of course, and he’d make some remark about how we were supposed to be friends or how mean you were. But in reality, I don’t think Dick ever once got mad or even irritated at pickleball. He was pure joy to be around.

I wonder if it takes effort to be that sort of person–or did it just come naturally to him? Was it easy for him to be wonderful, kind, fun, and lovely? Or did he have to talk to himself about it? Did he have to work at it? Or was he born with an adorableness that you’d have to inherit genetically? Could I ever be even somewhat like him? I don’t know but I sure would like to be. I sure would love to embody his spirit for this last part of my life.

“Genuinely good people are like that. The sun shines out of them. They warm you right through.”

― Michael Morpurgo, Alone on a Wide Wide Sea

I know I should count myself lucky when my losses are hard, because they tell me I’ve had someone wonderful in my life. If I hadn’t met Dick or had the pleasure and fun of his company on the courts, I would be feeling very differently today. But what a loss that, too, would be.
If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. And if you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems on here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”