Two things. First, I listened today to a guided meditation by Georgina Noel titled “Connecting With Next Level You.” She is a mixed bag of F-bombs, red lipstick and black leather, raucous laughter, and beautiful guided meditations. One has to stay open.
Anyway, this meditation conjured up a golden retriever and an image of me very similar to one that popped up once before. I’m older and thinner, with wispy grey hair pulled back, smiling peacefully. I look a bit like Roshi Joan Halifax. Next Level Me is wise, spiritual, centered, the picture of contentment and equanimity. Nothing about her suggests scrappy pickleball player, sharp-tongued friend, loud-singing Rummy Royal player, cursing Mahjongg devotee, or enterprising artist/writer.
Second, in Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s book, My Own Words (with Mary Hartnett and Wendy W. Williams), she tells of her father-in-law advising her that to make a marriage work, you need to “be a little deaf.”
There’s a pearl of wisdom for you! This simple but profound gem applies not only to marriage, I feel, but to any relationship one might have. How much happier I, for one, would be if I could just ignore those little comments that annoy, irritate, and stick with me for hours or days (years?). Often they’re made by people who do not even figure that big in my life, and yet. Or maybe they are comments from people I love, people for whom I should really have so much more patience. And yet, I’m bugged, I’m irritated, I hold on. My heart scowls. Grr.
I love that image of Next Level Me very much. Peaceful, centered, contented, exuding love. This is what I really do want for the last part of my life. Can I get there? Wouldn’t it be grand? Maybe by “being a little deaf” I could get closer. Perhaps this, along with other helpful practices, will get me nearly there. And perhaps I could do it while still being true to the wilder parts of me.
But why the golden retriever? I’ve never had a large dog, but this is twice one has shown up in my imagination. I’m going to have to meditate on this. Perhaps Joan Halifax has one.
“Conceptual knowledge is so valued in our world. Yet in many cultures wisdom is equated not with knowledge but with an open heart.” ― Joan Halifax, Being with Dying
“Release your potential and unleash your true self into the world.” – Georgina Noel
“Nowhere to go, nothing to do . . . Lost and found in the moment . . . Just practice this . . . Maybe here is where we find wholeheartedness and our true freedom.” ― Joan Halifax, Standing at the Edge
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Thanks for listening,
Kay
P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”