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Wish Making

Crystal Bridges Art Museum, 2012

I just celebrated my birthday. I woke especially early on the day, to a bright cool morning, one of those that I think of as magical. And Miles wanted to go out, so my early waking became an early Up Time, too. Perfect. I stood out on the balcony while Miles putzed around in the yard. I was thinking about what I want in my next year, my life. Many things. I have many things with which I want to fill my days, my life. In my mind, standing there, stretching luxuriously, in that cool, pre-dawn air, I began making a list.

I want to see a fox again. More than one and often. I haven’t seen one in awhile. I want foxes to live close at hand. I want to go to New York again . . . to have at least another good year with both of my dogs . . . to see that gorgeous Caribbean water again, soon. I want a really good piece of cake.

I continued my list the next morning.

Curiosity Here I Am

LIST OF THINGS I WANT

To bring forth magic and passion in my painting and my writing

To deepen my friendships

EQUANIMITY

Adventure . . . travel . . . gentle daring

To be kind

To manifest innocent mischief

Lightness

Openness

Magic & passion in everything I do and touch

To savor everything

Connectedness

Joie de vivre

To be like a hot air balloon–full, airborne, colorful, adventurous, rising, floating.

I did not see a fox on my birthday or the next day. I am okay with that. I have seen them around here and I will again. Many of these other things on my list, however, are up to me. And isn’t that the best kind of wish to have, anyway–a wish that I, myself, can make happen? These are the sorts of things that put me in the driver’s seat, so to speak, of this shiny red moon-roofed, zippy, road-hugging, responsive yet thrilling car we call Life.

What’s on your list?

“If you are a dreamer come in

If you are a dreamer a wisher a liar

A hoper a pray-er a magic-bean-buyer

If you’re a pretender come sit by my fire

For we have some flax golden tales to spin.

Come in!

Come in!”

― Shel Silverstein

“We often confuse what we wish for with what is.” ― Neil Gaiman, MirrorMask

“Wish on everything. Pink cars are good, especially old ones. And stars of course, first stars and shooting stars. Planes will do if they are the first light in the sky and look like stars. Wish in tunnels, holding your breath and lifting your feet off the ground. Birthday candles. Baby teeth.”― Francesca Lia Block

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. And if you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. And if someone forwarded this one to you, you can sign up here to receive the letters right in your Inbox. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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Our Birthday Month!

August is my birthday month. Mine, that is, and Miles’. I like having my birthday towards the end of the month because then I feel entitled to celebrate all month long. And since Miles’ birthday is also this month–on the 19th–it’s extra great. And his is coming up this week.

I know the exact date of his birthday because he came from a breeder. I did not buy him myself. He was given up to a woman who routinely called breeders to ask if they had any dogs they were planning to give up. Her idea was to save the dogs from being put in the pound or worse. Miles is supposed to be a miniature poodle, but he is rather large. He’s taller and beefier than miniatures usually are–a great size for a dog, I feel. But I imagine he was not a very good advertisement for that particular breeder. So she gave him to the woman and then that woman could not keep him and passed him on to a gal who finds homes for dogs.

Miles with a new toy when he was one.

As it happened, I got Miles on his half birthday–February 19th. He was exactly six months old. And having been in a crate or a variety of crates and other enclosures for most of his six months, he was quite exuberant to be out. I can still see him, in my mind’s eye, on the day I met him, bouncing with excitement at the end of the leash. And then, on our first walks in the neighborhood, he tried to go up the walks and front steps of just about every house we passed. “Who lives here?” he was asking. “Is this our house? Is there a dog inside? Can we go in? Can we??” He sure was a happy dog. (He still is.) The breeder had reputedly said, “He has a gentle soul.” And he really does.

So we have two birthdays to celebrate this month. I usually get him a large rawhide bone for his birthday and then he gets a slightly bigger helping of dinner, even though he’s watching his weight. I like to sing “Happy Birthday” all throughout the day. To be fair, I sing it throughout the day on my own birthday, too. Miles gives me many kisses and his usual super soulful, loving looks. Same as every day, as he makes a fuss over me every day of the year. Every time I come home from anywhere, he acts as if I’ve been gone for weeks. Still, even twelve years later. That’s my darling Miles.

I wrote this poem after having traveled, as I often do, to California to see my siblings. Miles was not quite three years old then.

Home

How simple a thing it is to be at home
again where one’s heart is
to occupy one’s own bed, the covers skimming
one’s bones as they are known to do
the familiar clock and lamp at the elbow
the special mug for tea now full, now empty
to see the neighbor’s green house outside the window
to feel upon one’s thigh the known weight of a beloved dog
whose two baby teeth lie downstairs in a small blue bowl
where they could be found, admired, touched
whenever one wanted.
How simple, how simply grand.

I still have those two baby teeth. 😉

If you’re looking for my cards or art, you’ll find all of that on my website. And if you enjoy these letters, feel free to forward this one to anyone you think might like it. Finally, you’ll find past letters and poems here.

Thanks for listening,
Kay

P.S. MerryThoughts is the name of my first book, out of print at the moment. The word is a British one, referring both to a wishbone and to the ritual of breaking the wishbone with the intention of either having a wish granted or being the one who marries first, thus the “merry thoughts.”

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Birthdays

I love the number twenty-seven possibly

because I was born on the 27th day of

August and I love my own birthday and

others’ as well and parties celebrations

anniversaries occasions of all kinds and

I am baffled and displeased by those who

say It’s just another day as if their own

or anyone else’s birth were inconsequential

somehow irrelevant to the fact that here

they are here we are here she is and he is

alive breathing living in the world affecting

others changing the course of things possibly

creating more life, as if to say So what? as if

to suggest that the minutest thises and thats

that occurred at the precise time to create

the exact you that was born on a given day are

nothing of consequence nothing at all and

all of it is nothing at all at least nothing to

be remarked upon acknowledged or even noticed.

Well, I am against it.